In The Crazy Life of Michael Scott Sandberg
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
haha glitch..
ok. theres a glitch. im feeling better. however. i havent been exercising very much. Havent had the time. School has been grueling. Its hard to eat healthy when youre stressed, tired, and emotional haha! all ya want is food and goodies! Today i made a coconut dough cookie with oatmeal, coconut and big chocolate chips! Mmm!! so good. they arent helping my cause. I need motivation. Oh well. Maybe once school ends i can get back on track haha. Love my life.
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Day 1:
Ok. Last night I went to the gym. I did hamstrings, quads, glutes, chest, biceps, and abs. I then did the bike for 30 minutes then relaxed in the sauna for another half hour. Today... I had a V8 for breakfast. A jamba jiuce for lunch. I then had some chicken nuggets and a double stack from Burger King. I then got a cookie at ruby snaps! For dinner. Suagr free pudding and chili :) Today was half good half ok. Can only get better from here.
PS. NEW HAIRCUT TODAY!!! i feel amazing.
PS. NEW HAIRCUT TODAY!!! i feel amazing.
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
My Life Is Out Of Control.
The title of this blog says it all. No more. I am tired of not feeling good enough. Im tired of being in pain. Im tired of stress, suffering, and hard emotions. I am going to become who I want to be. I am in control of my life.
I will get in better shape. I will start blogging my success and results. I am going to be more spiritual. I am going to do better in school. I am going to run my life how it makes me the happiest.
Heres to the future. Im off work, and heading to the gym :)
I will get in better shape. I will start blogging my success and results. I am going to be more spiritual. I am going to do better in school. I am going to run my life how it makes me the happiest.
Heres to the future. Im off work, and heading to the gym :)
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
New Year. New Experiences. New Me.
New Years Resolutions... they are some of my favorite things. I love setting new goals! I recently havent been the best at doing them. This morning when I woke up I felt different. I realized I need to change my life around. As much as I love my life... Im not where I want to be in it. I want to improve. I need to improve. You only live once. Dont settle for mediocrity as Darin W. said in his talk on sunday. What an amazing talk that was. He told many stories that hit hard on my heart. I have been living like Simon and Tumba. I have been content just living to be happy. I need to change. I need to do whats right and important, even if its not the most fun or desirable! Life isnt all about you. Life is a reality game show... the prize for completing it.. eternal life.
I was watching Fear Factor the other night... I decided life is like Fear Factor. You have to overcome some of the most trying and painful obstacles and tasks in hopes of winning at the end. No we dont have to eat pig hearts or jump out of helicopters... but we have to overcome addictions... temptations... fears... trials. In my opinion... if Eternal Life could be obtained by eating shit from a bull... id do it. I would MUCH rather eat or do something horrid to obtain it than the day to day suffering with the constant pressures from Satan. I would tell Satan to go to hell... but he's already there. haha! So, now I just gotta make sure Im not making the decisions that send me there to join him!! With that in mind here are my New Years Resolutions!!!
2012 New Year's Resolutions:
1.) Run 1000 miles in total this year. (about 20 miles a week)
2.) Beat my fastest time in a marathon.
3.) Travel somewhere different.
4.) Read my scriptures atleast once a week. (seems weak... but its better than nothing! baby steps people...)
5.) Go to the temple once a month.
6.) Make a new friend.
7.) Resisting the urges of my natural man.
8.) Go on one date a month.
9.) No more pop.
10.) No eating after 8pm.
Well... There you have it. My goals for 2012. I hope that with this I will become a better friend, a better servant, and a better looking man ;) Here's to 2012!! May it bring new experiences, new people, new favorites, and be the BEST YEAR YET!!!
I was watching Fear Factor the other night... I decided life is like Fear Factor. You have to overcome some of the most trying and painful obstacles and tasks in hopes of winning at the end. No we dont have to eat pig hearts or jump out of helicopters... but we have to overcome addictions... temptations... fears... trials. In my opinion... if Eternal Life could be obtained by eating shit from a bull... id do it. I would MUCH rather eat or do something horrid to obtain it than the day to day suffering with the constant pressures from Satan. I would tell Satan to go to hell... but he's already there. haha! So, now I just gotta make sure Im not making the decisions that send me there to join him!! With that in mind here are my New Years Resolutions!!!
2012 New Year's Resolutions:
1.) Run 1000 miles in total this year. (about 20 miles a week)
2.) Beat my fastest time in a marathon.
3.) Travel somewhere different.
4.) Read my scriptures atleast once a week. (seems weak... but its better than nothing! baby steps people...)
5.) Go to the temple once a month.
6.) Make a new friend.
7.) Resisting the urges of my natural man.
8.) Go on one date a month.
9.) No more pop.
10.) No eating after 8pm.
Well... There you have it. My goals for 2012. I hope that with this I will become a better friend, a better servant, and a better looking man ;) Here's to 2012!! May it bring new experiences, new people, new favorites, and be the BEST YEAR YET!!!
Looking Back On 2011.
I am in a dangerously contemplative mood today. I dont know why this mood has consumed every inch of my body, but regardless, it has. Deal with it. Looking back on the old year I had some amazing memories and experiences. Just to name a few and in no particular order they are...
1.) Watching Maria Sharapova LIVE!!! I was three feet away from her at one point. I got to watch her play three times as well as warm up at the BNP Paribas Open in Indian Wells, CA. Incredible!! Maria Sharapova has been my favorite tennis player for 9 years. While at the tournament I got the signatures of several tennis players. It was a dream.
2.) Running the Salt Lake Marathon in 3 hours 3 minutes. Personal best. What made it even sweeter is the fact that I dominated the guy I used to sit by in psychology. He always came into class with his perfect body and tiny legs wearing the latest jogging outfits. Rich boy. Insanely nice and genuine guy... but the kind thats so irritatingly perfect you almost hate them. Yeah... I killed him at the race. It was amazing to cross the finish line, eat, rest, then when walking out to the car seeing him come in for the half mile stretch :) muahaha!!
3.) Having my boys come home from their missions!!! For two years I faithfully wrote Ryan, Matt, Mark, and Cameron!! THEYRE HOME!!! Life has been so good with them back.
4.) Meeting David Mann and CJ Hanson. They have been two very important guys in my life. David and I became friends at Ryans homecoming party. He and I just clicked right off the bat. Instant buds! We have partied and rocked it out ever since. I love the fact that he likes a lot of the things I do and owns up to it! As for CJ, well, he's just simply incredible. I havent had a friendship like his... ever. We became best friends over night. He is a blast. We're so similar but with good differences. I love you guys!!
5.) Receiving a 4.0 at the U this year :)
6.) My summer getaway trip with my best friend DeeDee Smith! We went to St. George over the Fourth of July weekend. It was soooo much fun!! We did mini photo shoots in the hotel room, swam in the pool, and ate some pretty delicious foods. My favorite part is that DeeDee isnt afraid to be spontaneous with me! We pulled off the road twice to take random photos together haha! It was a hoot. We drank Diet Coke the whole way there and back. We even created an inside joke that made us laugh until we both had tears down our faces. I love you DeeDee. Best Friends for 9 years and going strong.
7.) Indian Wells trip with Ryan Nelson.... FREAKING AMAZING!!!! Probably one of the best vacations of my life. We had agreed to make it super cheap... and spur of the moment. If we wanted to do something.. we'd do it. We made the 10.5 hour drive down... almost running out of gas completely on the way!! We had to drive all around some creepy mountain and town in Nevada. Barely made it. We sang like fools and ate lots of goodies and sandwiches! We arrived and spent the first day doing some grooming. I did a total body shave down and i believe he just shaved his legs. We tanned by the pool. Shopped in 115 degree heat. Went to the movies. Went to an incredible modern art gallery in palm springs. We also took a day to go out to LA and Venice Beach. WHAT A BLAST!! A bird took a shit on me when i was sun bathing... NO I DID NOT NEED YOUR SUNBLOCK YA DAMN SEAGULL!!!! the australians laughed at me.... :( Anyways. We stayed up late watching movies, eating pudding, chocolate chips, and drinks! What an incredible trip. Love ya Ryan. This summer... were doing another one!
8.) The trip to Moab where I was scarred for life. Ryan, Allie, Lindsy, and myself... we all go down to moab with random friends. basically watched a girl jump off a cliff into shallow waters and shater both her heels. Disgusting!!!! Blood was everywhere. Bones sticking out. Traumatizing!!!
9.) Trip to Park City with David, Mietra, and Cheri. Hahaha!! One of THE funnest over night trips. We hot tubbed. Went out to eat. We then played hide and seek in the condo! Felt like a kid again. It was refreshingly awesome!!!
10.) Got hired by the Deseret News. I LOVE MY JOB!!!
11.) Goofy photo shoot with Mady. It was our date. We shopped at the DI and bought the most hideous outfits on earth. Pretended to be married and went into Sears photo studio. We got some photos done together. They make my day every time i see them! What a fun day!
12.) My surprise party. This was the BEST birthday I've ever had in my life. Matt Brown threw me a party with the help of some others. DeeDee and Mady helped with a HUGE gift surprise. Mark and Lauren made me THE coolest tennis ball cupcakes and tennis court cake! I was overwhlemed by so many friends coming and being with me on my special day. It was wonderful. Quite possibly one of the best days of the year. Thank you again Matt. Youll never know how much that meant to me.
13.) Purchasing new photography equipment! This big purchase will really help me push my photography business further!
14.) Becoming better friends with Kelli and Jordan Brough :) It has been such a good year with them as friends. theyve been there for me through so much. I love you guys! Indoor surfing was one of the funnest activities I've ever done!
15.) Tried sushi and raw fish for the first time!! Discovered I am allergic to raw fish and that I HATE seaweed! haha! At the same time... I learned I like teriyaki tofu :)
16.) Discovering RubySnaps!!! BEST COOKIES ON EARTH!!!! I go there tooo often. Thank you Tami for creating the ultimate comfort treat. I love you.
17.) Quitting at Maceys :)
18.) I achieved the fittest body Ive ever had at one point in the summer. I looked GOOD! I need to get back to that and make it even better!
19.) Trip up to see Ryan twice this year. Both times were a BLAST!! The first time just us boys kicked it. We watched funny videos on youtube.. cooked spaghetti and saw a concert by Sean Kingston!! I was a little disappointed but it was still fun! The second time David, CJ, and myself went up to party with Ryan. We cleaned the sink at Angies? I think thats what it was called. We went to parties and played bean bag toss and just dance. It was a good time! I got pulled over and DIDNT GET A TICKET!! First time in my life thats happened!! I hope that trend continues!
20.) Going to Tucanos for the first time!! Cameron Peterson and I had a boys night and it was A BLAST! We went out to Tucanos and we ate meat until we almost died. We then went to my first independent movie premiere to support our friend Dusti. That was a good time. We then went and baked cupcakes to enjoy with David and Cheri. That was one of the best nights! mmm... Tucanos...
Well... Thats all I can think of for right now. Ill have to go through old emails to my missionaries to see what I was up to throughout the year and see if I missed any favorite memories! But overall... id say it was a pretty good year. It had the ups and the downs. Some bigger than others. Some months were hell. Some months were incredible. Take life as it comes. Endure joyfully til the end. May this new year bring so much more :)
1.) Watching Maria Sharapova LIVE!!! I was three feet away from her at one point. I got to watch her play three times as well as warm up at the BNP Paribas Open in Indian Wells, CA. Incredible!! Maria Sharapova has been my favorite tennis player for 9 years. While at the tournament I got the signatures of several tennis players. It was a dream.
2.) Running the Salt Lake Marathon in 3 hours 3 minutes. Personal best. What made it even sweeter is the fact that I dominated the guy I used to sit by in psychology. He always came into class with his perfect body and tiny legs wearing the latest jogging outfits. Rich boy. Insanely nice and genuine guy... but the kind thats so irritatingly perfect you almost hate them. Yeah... I killed him at the race. It was amazing to cross the finish line, eat, rest, then when walking out to the car seeing him come in for the half mile stretch :) muahaha!!
3.) Having my boys come home from their missions!!! For two years I faithfully wrote Ryan, Matt, Mark, and Cameron!! THEYRE HOME!!! Life has been so good with them back.
4.) Meeting David Mann and CJ Hanson. They have been two very important guys in my life. David and I became friends at Ryans homecoming party. He and I just clicked right off the bat. Instant buds! We have partied and rocked it out ever since. I love the fact that he likes a lot of the things I do and owns up to it! As for CJ, well, he's just simply incredible. I havent had a friendship like his... ever. We became best friends over night. He is a blast. We're so similar but with good differences. I love you guys!!
5.) Receiving a 4.0 at the U this year :)
6.) My summer getaway trip with my best friend DeeDee Smith! We went to St. George over the Fourth of July weekend. It was soooo much fun!! We did mini photo shoots in the hotel room, swam in the pool, and ate some pretty delicious foods. My favorite part is that DeeDee isnt afraid to be spontaneous with me! We pulled off the road twice to take random photos together haha! It was a hoot. We drank Diet Coke the whole way there and back. We even created an inside joke that made us laugh until we both had tears down our faces. I love you DeeDee. Best Friends for 9 years and going strong.
7.) Indian Wells trip with Ryan Nelson.... FREAKING AMAZING!!!! Probably one of the best vacations of my life. We had agreed to make it super cheap... and spur of the moment. If we wanted to do something.. we'd do it. We made the 10.5 hour drive down... almost running out of gas completely on the way!! We had to drive all around some creepy mountain and town in Nevada. Barely made it. We sang like fools and ate lots of goodies and sandwiches! We arrived and spent the first day doing some grooming. I did a total body shave down and i believe he just shaved his legs. We tanned by the pool. Shopped in 115 degree heat. Went to the movies. Went to an incredible modern art gallery in palm springs. We also took a day to go out to LA and Venice Beach. WHAT A BLAST!! A bird took a shit on me when i was sun bathing... NO I DID NOT NEED YOUR SUNBLOCK YA DAMN SEAGULL!!!! the australians laughed at me.... :( Anyways. We stayed up late watching movies, eating pudding, chocolate chips, and drinks! What an incredible trip. Love ya Ryan. This summer... were doing another one!
8.) The trip to Moab where I was scarred for life. Ryan, Allie, Lindsy, and myself... we all go down to moab with random friends. basically watched a girl jump off a cliff into shallow waters and shater both her heels. Disgusting!!!! Blood was everywhere. Bones sticking out. Traumatizing!!!
9.) Trip to Park City with David, Mietra, and Cheri. Hahaha!! One of THE funnest over night trips. We hot tubbed. Went out to eat. We then played hide and seek in the condo! Felt like a kid again. It was refreshingly awesome!!!
10.) Got hired by the Deseret News. I LOVE MY JOB!!!
11.) Goofy photo shoot with Mady. It was our date. We shopped at the DI and bought the most hideous outfits on earth. Pretended to be married and went into Sears photo studio. We got some photos done together. They make my day every time i see them! What a fun day!
12.) My surprise party. This was the BEST birthday I've ever had in my life. Matt Brown threw me a party with the help of some others. DeeDee and Mady helped with a HUGE gift surprise. Mark and Lauren made me THE coolest tennis ball cupcakes and tennis court cake! I was overwhlemed by so many friends coming and being with me on my special day. It was wonderful. Quite possibly one of the best days of the year. Thank you again Matt. Youll never know how much that meant to me.
13.) Purchasing new photography equipment! This big purchase will really help me push my photography business further!
14.) Becoming better friends with Kelli and Jordan Brough :) It has been such a good year with them as friends. theyve been there for me through so much. I love you guys! Indoor surfing was one of the funnest activities I've ever done!
15.) Tried sushi and raw fish for the first time!! Discovered I am allergic to raw fish and that I HATE seaweed! haha! At the same time... I learned I like teriyaki tofu :)
16.) Discovering RubySnaps!!! BEST COOKIES ON EARTH!!!! I go there tooo often. Thank you Tami for creating the ultimate comfort treat. I love you.
17.) Quitting at Maceys :)
18.) I achieved the fittest body Ive ever had at one point in the summer. I looked GOOD! I need to get back to that and make it even better!
19.) Trip up to see Ryan twice this year. Both times were a BLAST!! The first time just us boys kicked it. We watched funny videos on youtube.. cooked spaghetti and saw a concert by Sean Kingston!! I was a little disappointed but it was still fun! The second time David, CJ, and myself went up to party with Ryan. We cleaned the sink at Angies? I think thats what it was called. We went to parties and played bean bag toss and just dance. It was a good time! I got pulled over and DIDNT GET A TICKET!! First time in my life thats happened!! I hope that trend continues!
20.) Going to Tucanos for the first time!! Cameron Peterson and I had a boys night and it was A BLAST! We went out to Tucanos and we ate meat until we almost died. We then went to my first independent movie premiere to support our friend Dusti. That was a good time. We then went and baked cupcakes to enjoy with David and Cheri. That was one of the best nights! mmm... Tucanos...
Well... Thats all I can think of for right now. Ill have to go through old emails to my missionaries to see what I was up to throughout the year and see if I missed any favorite memories! But overall... id say it was a pretty good year. It had the ups and the downs. Some bigger than others. Some months were hell. Some months were incredible. Take life as it comes. Endure joyfully til the end. May this new year bring so much more :)
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Today Is A New Day :)
I am feeling good today. Im finally feeling like myself. Maybe it was the 1 o'clock in the morning phone call and lack of sleep (Thank you David Mann). Not to mention jammin' to christmas music is always a good way to start the day. What starts the day even better? An hour and a half of tennis, provolone and spinach scrambled eggs, a surprise cleaning of the kitchen for my mom, and having a good hair day :)
Yes. Today is a good day. Im tired of feeling depressed and sad. BLAH! That's not me at all. So no more!! Im done being a pity party drag!! My name is Michael Scott Sandberg. I am an outgoing, fun, optimistic fool!! :D
I have an amazing life. I have great jobs that financially support my needs and wants. I have a loving family who is always there for me. Especially my sister in law Cassie. She has been helping me a lot through this rough week. So, even if she does or doesnt read this blog... I want to tell her thank you. She stayed up late and let me vent and express how I was truly feeling. I felt like no one wanted to hear about what was going on. I feel like what I need to get off my chest makes others uncomfortable. Maybe it does... but I cant help that. I need an outlet every now and then. So thank you again Cassie. You played a big role in my life this week. Thank you for being so sweet. In addition to my blessings are my talents and incredible friends who continually put up with me. I appreciate all of you.
Well. It is currently 10:12am on a thursday morning. I have 12 hours of work ahead of me... but im not going to worry about that. Today will be a good day. I am sure of it. Hope everyone else enjoys their day as well. I love you all.
YEEEHHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Yes. Today is a good day. Im tired of feeling depressed and sad. BLAH! That's not me at all. So no more!! Im done being a pity party drag!! My name is Michael Scott Sandberg. I am an outgoing, fun, optimistic fool!! :D
I have an amazing life. I have great jobs that financially support my needs and wants. I have a loving family who is always there for me. Especially my sister in law Cassie. She has been helping me a lot through this rough week. So, even if she does or doesnt read this blog... I want to tell her thank you. She stayed up late and let me vent and express how I was truly feeling. I felt like no one wanted to hear about what was going on. I feel like what I need to get off my chest makes others uncomfortable. Maybe it does... but I cant help that. I need an outlet every now and then. So thank you again Cassie. You played a big role in my life this week. Thank you for being so sweet. In addition to my blessings are my talents and incredible friends who continually put up with me. I appreciate all of you.
Well. It is currently 10:12am on a thursday morning. I have 12 hours of work ahead of me... but im not going to worry about that. Today will be a good day. I am sure of it. Hope everyone else enjoys their day as well. I love you all.
YEEEHHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
I Miss You
((Stupid blogger. This was supposed to be posted yesterday))
My days arent the same. I feel alone. I miss our daily texting. Telling you everything. Hearing your laugh. The phone calls after 10:30pm. Got off work... barely made it to the elevator before the tears started to roll down my cheeks. They continued to flow until late in the night... after i got home... when i rushed into the arms of my mom... and into my pillow until the night swept me away into my dreams. It was miserable.
I went to the temple in the pursuit of feeling comforted... I guess I need to keep going. Heavenly Father must know how strong I am. I guess this is my time to learn how strong I am for myself.
I keep listening to "The One That Got Away" by Katy Perry. "Party Rock Anthem" by LMFAO, doesnt help. Why does the radio insist on playing it over and over? It's bad enough we are no longer in contact. Do I have to be reminded of it daily?
I know this is all for the best. So why do I still hurt? Why wont the comfort of knowing that this is what needs to happen for me, override all the suffering? Im tired of feeling this way. It is beginning to affect who I am. Friends are starting to complain that my demeanor has changed. I know im in a funk... Im trying to stay happy. I just cant bring myself to fake it. In time, it will all be made well.
I hope it isnt as hard for you as it has been for me. I hope you are happy. I hope you are feeling better and not experiencing the same symptoms that are plaguing my soul. I want whats best for you. I want whats best for me. I pray the combination of our faith will ultimately allow a miracle to happen.
I want you back in my life. I cant have you the way I once did. I'll take anything at this point. It is Day Three. We have gone over 72 hours without communication. Weird to think... that all it took was the first 72 hours for me to realize how amazing you are. Took 96 hours for us both to be awakened to the reality of what was happening. Only a week and a half later... and I was in love with you.
I wish things would have gone differently. However, that doesnt mean I regret anything. I learned a lot. I gained a beautiful friendship. I felt a new kind of love. I started to understand what everyone else had tried to explain to me all throughout my life. Thank you.
Thank you for making me feel alive. Thank you for showing me what it is like to feel loved. To feel appreciated and valued. To feel attractive. To feel needed, wanted, desired. No one has ever made me feel all of those things at once. You will always be special to me. I just hope to one day find it again... under different circumstances, with someone else.
It is amazing how typing out all the things that go down in my head help... I feel better.
F.Y.I - I put your name in the temple. I hope it helps. Im praying everyday for us. I will continue to do so.
This has been a rough month. I hope to learn what it is Heavenly Father is trying to teach me. Maybe this isnt a lesson at all. Maybe it's just another test. I hope this is one of those trials that once it is over... something beautiful happens. I will keep my fingers crossed. Even if it isnt... I will continue with faith and optimism. That is all we really can do in life. Keep going. Life doesnt stop. It carries on with or without us. It is up to us to make the best of it. To take life for what it is... and enjoy it.
Life is a gift. Sure it has the ups and the downs... but in the end, I know itll all be worth it. I know that my future will be bright. I have been promised many wonderful things. All I need to do to gain these promises, is stay faithful and work hard. I am doing just that. I am working hard. I am staying true to the faith.
I believe in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I am a member of this glorious gospel. Is it easy? No. Is it worth it? Absolutely.
Hope you know you are missed. That I look forward to the day we can see each other again. I know it is hard right now, but I have faith that it will be worth it in the end. Hang in there. Be seeing you.
My days arent the same. I feel alone. I miss our daily texting. Telling you everything. Hearing your laugh. The phone calls after 10:30pm. Got off work... barely made it to the elevator before the tears started to roll down my cheeks. They continued to flow until late in the night... after i got home... when i rushed into the arms of my mom... and into my pillow until the night swept me away into my dreams. It was miserable.
I went to the temple in the pursuit of feeling comforted... I guess I need to keep going. Heavenly Father must know how strong I am. I guess this is my time to learn how strong I am for myself.
I keep listening to "The One That Got Away" by Katy Perry. "Party Rock Anthem" by LMFAO, doesnt help. Why does the radio insist on playing it over and over? It's bad enough we are no longer in contact. Do I have to be reminded of it daily?
I know this is all for the best. So why do I still hurt? Why wont the comfort of knowing that this is what needs to happen for me, override all the suffering? Im tired of feeling this way. It is beginning to affect who I am. Friends are starting to complain that my demeanor has changed. I know im in a funk... Im trying to stay happy. I just cant bring myself to fake it. In time, it will all be made well.
I hope it isnt as hard for you as it has been for me. I hope you are happy. I hope you are feeling better and not experiencing the same symptoms that are plaguing my soul. I want whats best for you. I want whats best for me. I pray the combination of our faith will ultimately allow a miracle to happen.
I want you back in my life. I cant have you the way I once did. I'll take anything at this point. It is Day Three. We have gone over 72 hours without communication. Weird to think... that all it took was the first 72 hours for me to realize how amazing you are. Took 96 hours for us both to be awakened to the reality of what was happening. Only a week and a half later... and I was in love with you.
I wish things would have gone differently. However, that doesnt mean I regret anything. I learned a lot. I gained a beautiful friendship. I felt a new kind of love. I started to understand what everyone else had tried to explain to me all throughout my life. Thank you.
Thank you for making me feel alive. Thank you for showing me what it is like to feel loved. To feel appreciated and valued. To feel attractive. To feel needed, wanted, desired. No one has ever made me feel all of those things at once. You will always be special to me. I just hope to one day find it again... under different circumstances, with someone else.
It is amazing how typing out all the things that go down in my head help... I feel better.
F.Y.I - I put your name in the temple. I hope it helps. Im praying everyday for us. I will continue to do so.
This has been a rough month. I hope to learn what it is Heavenly Father is trying to teach me. Maybe this isnt a lesson at all. Maybe it's just another test. I hope this is one of those trials that once it is over... something beautiful happens. I will keep my fingers crossed. Even if it isnt... I will continue with faith and optimism. That is all we really can do in life. Keep going. Life doesnt stop. It carries on with or without us. It is up to us to make the best of it. To take life for what it is... and enjoy it.
Life is a gift. Sure it has the ups and the downs... but in the end, I know itll all be worth it. I know that my future will be bright. I have been promised many wonderful things. All I need to do to gain these promises, is stay faithful and work hard. I am doing just that. I am working hard. I am staying true to the faith.
I believe in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I am a member of this glorious gospel. Is it easy? No. Is it worth it? Absolutely.
Hope you know you are missed. That I look forward to the day we can see each other again. I know it is hard right now, but I have faith that it will be worth it in the end. Hang in there. Be seeing you.
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